Ah, La Croix. The nectar of the LA Tan-ned, Soul Cycling, Instagram influencer gods. Also known as the lightly-flavored carbonated drink that tastes like drinking water while someone yells out the name of a fruit in the other room. I saw this absurd recipe on Facebook, and just couldn’t resist. How terribly, awfully millennial.
I spent a good chunk of my third year in university at my boyfriend-at-the-time’s house; a small split-level shared with three other guys. Posters of Scarface, hockey players, and scantily-clad women dotted the walls; forties of Colt 45 lined the seventies-style shelving in the living room. My ex-SO was a line chef who lived in one side of the basement, a room sealed off from the other half (the “party side”) by a makeshift wall of empty beer boxes. We cooked a lot: cheese-stuffed burgers, shrimp pasta, eggs benedict and, a big favorite, beer butt chicken—accompanied by several cans of non-chicken-sodomizing beer.
Guy Fieri’s recipe was, and always has been, a go-to. The bacon drape was optional (and we would add small pats of butter underneath the skin in lieu of the bacon) but with or without, the recipe never failed to turn out a juicy and succulent roasted chicken. For this recipe, however, I stuck to Tastemade’s recipe and…
*Drumroll*
It turned out alright. It was like gentrified beer butt chicken. Serve hot, with a side of avocado toast and anxiety.
Chicken A La Croix
Recipe from Tastemade.com
Ingredients
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1 (3 lb) chicken
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3 tbsp olive oil
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2 tbsp tangerine zest
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1 tbsp lemon zest
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1 tbsp brown sugar
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2 tsp fresh thyme
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1 tsp fresh rosemary, minced
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1 tsp sea salt
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Freshly ground black pepper
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3 tangerines, halved
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1 lemon, sliced into rounds
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1 head garlic, halved
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1/4 cup white wine
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1 (12 oz) can citrus seltzer like La Croix Tangerine or Grapefruit
Instructions
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Preheat the oven to 400 degrees and remove the second rack. Secure the lower rack at the lowest setting so the chicken will fit standing upright.
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Pat chicken skin dry. In a small bowl, combine olive oil, tangerine zest, lemon zest, brown sugar, thyme leaves and minced rosemary. Stir to combine and brush over entire chicken. Stuff 1 tangerine half in the top cavity of the chicken. Sprinkle entire bird with salt and pepper.
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In a medium roasting pan, place remaining halved tangerines, sliced lemon, halved garlic and additional sprigs of rosemary and thyme. Add white wine. Place open seltzer can in the middle of the pan.
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Place the chicken over the can by opening the rear cavity and sliding it over the can until only about an inch of the can is showing. Rest legs on sliced citrus to avoid burning.
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Roast for 15 minutes to brown skin, then reduce heat to 350 and roast for 45 minutes, or until the internal temperature is 160 and the skin is crisp and golden.
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Remove the pan from the oven and carefully transfer the chicken from the can to a flat surface. Let rest for 20 minutes before slicing to serve. Serve drizzled with pan juices.
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